At Deaf's Door

My dad finds my deafness hysterically funny.
(NB: He's the only person allowed to laugh!)
I think he gets a kick out of someone much younger being in a worse state than he is.

Yesterday's conversations went a bit like this:

Dad: Mumble, mumble.
Me: What?
Dad: (cheeky grin) Oh, nothing. Just talking to myself.

Dad: Mumble, mumble.
Me: What?
Dad: Mumble, mumble.
Me: Nope, still can't hear you.
Dad: Mumble, mumble.
Me: Eh? Hang on. Let me lean close to you. Now, what did you say?
Dad: Incomprehensible mumble.
Me: Come again, one more time.
Dad: Louder mumble.
Me: Hang on - that's not English. What is that?
Dad: (cheeky grin) It's Russian!
Me: I didn't even know you could speak bloody Russian!